Sometimes

Sometimes it takes all the self-restraint in the world

to not tell u all the things i'm dying to say.

how much of a hypocrite u can be.

how much u are quick to anger.

how little tolerance u have when the things u say/do are said/done back to u.

But at the same time i feel silly.

no matter how undeserving it was,

no matter how upsetting it was,

for not wanting to speak to u.

and to try to show u i am upset.

And so i apologize.

Which is, once again, something i'd never say.

It's times like these i don't know whether i feel more stupid, angry, or guilty.

it seems the latter is my dominant trait.

and it sucks.

that no matter how angry i am,

i end up feeling responsible for it anyways.